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Javva The Hutt July 29th, 2003

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Back to newsletter 032 contents | All Javva's articles

Surfing for pleasure

I went surfing for pleasure. That means I looked at the odd page that particularly interested me, followed random links, and searched for jokes and quotes. And I came across Liudvikas Bukys collection of quotes. This is worth a look if you have and idle moment or two.

There were several gems, not least the explanation of why the US railroad gauage is the size it is. But my favorite, was this brilliant put down of performance consultants (sorry Jack) by Richard M. Romano

I recently had someone evaluate my computer system and make recommendations for improving speed and efficiency, but all he did was make fun of my setup. The mistake was mine: I had accidentally hired an insultant.
-- Richard M. Romano

Not quite in the same league, but still quite good was this page on office and occupational jokes. My favorite here was real quote from a clearly superior manager

We know that communication is a problem, but the company is not going to discuss it with the employees.
(Switching supervisor, AT&T Long Lines Division)

Diary of a Hutt

May 14. Ah, the luxuries of nice beach. A few iced cans of beer, nice blow up chair, soft towel, a good book and kids who know how to play without bothering me. It doesn't get better than this. Of course I brought my laptop along, but can't really do that much on the beach, the screen contrast is too annoying. I have to crick into a really uncomfortable position to see anything, so surfing (the web type) is out. And surfing (the wet type) is out too, since I never got the hang of it.

May 15. Whatever happened to my dreams of retiring by the Sea and writing a novel? If only the dot-bomb hadn't bombed for a few more years, I'd be living my dreams. Ah well, I probably won't be winning the lottery either. Oh yes, I almost forgot, this is my diary on, so I really need to mention something related to Java performance. Well that's done. Now back to my holiday.

May 23. Smooooth. Lean back on your chair, close your eyes, pretend that there are no troubles anywhere in the world. Just empty your mind completely. Well, hi. Nice of you to join me up here in Nirvana. Some people like active holidays. Some like to just veg out and be at peace with the world. Not hard to guess what I do. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...


Javva The Hutt.

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